ashstfu:

i’m always so flattered when bees buzz around me. sorry miss, i’m not a flower, but it’s very sweet that you thought i was

(via lonelyheartscafe-deactivated202)

1n0c:

makes a personal post and immediately reblogs fifteen other posts to bury it like a body

(via fandomsallaroundme)

hell-propaganda:

The vampire coffin making industry must be insane. You can’t go to a human carpenter for that. No human person needs a guaranteed light sealed coffin that can open from the inside. They also probably drop way more money than is reasonable into these things, it’s not like a vampire is gonna wanna replace their coffin every century or be caught dead in a shabby cheap one, but humans make coffins to be viewed exactly once, comfort not a factor, and then nailed shut and buried in the ground. Completely different goals

Anyway all this to say I am a carpenter, vampire-friendly, and I use the utmost discretion in conducting my business

(via purrplexed)

choopahcobbler:

theweirdwideweb:

I forgot about setting the clocks back and thought this was about being turned into a vampire

(via fallpanes)